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Chip anyone? (From Clacton and Frinton Gazette)
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Tendring Talk is an irreverent, controversial column and the views expressed are not necessarily those of the Clacton Gazette or Newsquest.
Chip anyone?
9:15am Friday 24th October 2008
‘Ello, ello, ello, what’s going on here then?’ What is going on this week is that Essex Police is spending taxpayers’ money on putting electronic chips on the fuel tanks of police vehicles, so our boys and girls in blue do not put the wrong sort of fuel in.
Over the last five years, the force spent about £42,000 on repairs to vehicles which had been filled with the wrong fuel.
It’s an easy mistake to make apparently, but one that hardly fills you with comfort when you consider the awesome responsibilities the police force has.
We are supposed to have the best police in the world! A super hi-tech, 21st century force to protect society, uphold the law and prevent terrorism.
Apparently, however, they can’t be trusted at a petrol pump.
You hardly have to be Sherlock Holmes, Inspector Clouseau or Inspector flaming Gadget to be able to read the sticker on the inside of a petrol cap, but apparently it is too much for some.
You can picture it now, the Sweeney’s Jack Regan screeching round the streets of London in some souped-up Granada in a high speed chase, screaming “give it up sonny before I give you a smack, you’re nicked” out of the window before he suddenly grinds to a halt and George Carter says “sorry Guv, I put the wrong fuel in”.
Regan would have shot him!
Or in modern parlance, a Second World War veteran, at the end of his tether having called the police numerous times about a gang of feral youths kicking down his garden fence, shouting abuse and throwing things, finally snaps and gives one of the 14-year-olds a clip round the ear.
Before you can say “child abuse”, the yobs dial 999 and suddenly it is action stations.
Officers welcome being pulled out of their health and safety, illegal immigrant sexism and disability seminar to actually do some work.
The male officers (you can’t say policeman, even if they are men and in the police) who are monitoring Big Brother on Channel 4 in case someone says something out of turn, are told to turn off their tellies and get to action.
The PCSOs are told not to respond because they have not passed their bike proficiency tests, but the inspectors on self-improvement management courses are told to snap to it.
Even some of the top brass are told to stop investigating new ways of recording crimes statistics to make sure they go down and they all pile into a van.
Having made sure they mirror, signal, manoevre, the driver pulls away at an appropriate speed only to grind to a halt.
“Oh sugar (or the ruder expletive)” shouts one officer, and is immediately assigned to an appropriate use of language course.
Let’s hope the people feeding the police horses don’t make the same mistake and fill them full of ragwort.
l The views in this controversial column do not reflect thsoe of the Gazette, or its parent company and we welcome responses to its content.
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Your Say YourClacton
dodlebug, clacton says...
6:59pm Wed 21 Jan 09
Laughter is the best medicine 2 wrote:You are totally off your trolley Ian Burit the only laughter is at you sadman
: Laughter is the best medicine 2
dodlebug, clacton says...
7:00pm Wed 21 Jan 09
dodlebug, clacton says...
12:03pm Thu 22 Jan 09
Any thing I say.
IS PUBLISHED UNDER THE PROTECTION OF ARTICLE 10 (1) OF THE EUROPEAN CONVENTION OF HUMAN RIGHTS.
It all started when I and my family moved into a flat in Kings Road Clacton, we were there only a short while when a police officer Miss H moved in to the upstairs flat, there is a lot more to this story but I will keep it as short as possible.
I was recovering from a serious illness at the time, we had loads of noise almost 24 7 as she also had flatmates who were also police officers and they were on different shifts our rented flat was in need of modernising and had draftee old sash windows hers double glazed, so one noise trick the next door neighbour fell for was to play load music and because of the old windows in our flat and hers having double glazing coupled with no sound proofing between floors the loud music sounded to next door like it was coming from our flat so next door had us issued with a noise abatement letter. we didn’t even have a stereo at the time, to cut a long story short we had about 7 months of torture and hardly any sleep living under this police officer, one night I was very ill and my wife had to call the doctor out, my wife asked her to keep the noise down because I was ill and in the morning there was a full sized dead body outline in the middle of the drive in that yellow paint they use there was witnesses to this, so this was the last straw we took her to the police complaints but at this time it was totally carried out by them selves and they found no case to answer we were driven out of that flat in the end because after that the harassment got worse. one of the female flat mates who was also a police officer went to my wife’s place of work which was a shop and kept barging into my wife, there was even a witness to this who worked in the same shop. Another piece of harassment we had was a visit from I think it was a station sergeant who sat in our front room and one of the things he said was “What are you going to do when you need the police you haven’t got any police any more” we did not realise at the time it was a threat as it has turned out. Yes I did bang on the ceiling a very few times yes I did shout up at the ceiling after hours of torture but it didn’t warrant the systematic harassment launched on us.
And the plot thickens, some years later we move in next door to a cab driver Mr G who has a girlfriend Mrs S who he lives with now she said she didn't work for or have any police contacts, Mr G never really lived at the house next door, his at the start son of 13yr old and 9yr old daughter were there on there own most of the time and sometimes his older son, while he really lived with his girlfriend at her house, the son is about 17 or 18 now and at the moment seems to have disappeared, what a stitch up proof below plod!
http://archive.essex
countystandard.co.uk
/2004/9/29/125160.ht
ml
I swore after nearly 4 years of harassment physical and verbal and worse, from him and his family and extended family I get a criminal record, he runs me down and only gets a station warning, I call it police corruption I had no choice but to defend my family, because as your officer threatened us we have no police.
I find it almost amusing how Mrs S left such an important job to become a cab driver soon after we put a complaint in through Chelmsford about personnel information being given to the G family
http://archive.essex
countystandard.co.uk
/2005/9/7/232656.htm
l
This one above is a case of its fine if its mine because when I lived next door to the G family his son B G shot a passing driver with an air rifle well that’s what the police said but it was probably an air pistol because he pointed one at me when he was shooting out the back window ,as far as I no he got away with it as well as drug dealing driving a twist and go scooter at my 2 and half year old granddaughter on the pavement deliberately, threatening to get someone to burn our house down and many other things and Clacton police make me look the criminal when they by there dodgy policing put my grand daughter a small child at risk. I think the one he was going to get to burn us was the one that did the stabbing on Highfilds caravan park he was always round there house, so I guess he probably would have done it. If you really were impartial plod you would go to the prison and question him he can tell you some of the harassment we had off that family. You could also question Mr G’s mate Lee who approached me at the court and said he had been asked by Mr G to “do me over and cripple me”. The first Christmas we lived next door to him and that was just because I asked him to sort his son’s music noise out which all the neighbours were complaining about.
dodlebug, clacton says...
12:28pm Thu 22 Jan 09
Your sayYour Clacton
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Laughter is the best medicine 2, County wide says...
8:44pm Mon 19 Jan 09